It never goes away...|Feeling · 情感 - 我们的自由天空公益助学项目组（OFS，桃李天）

只看楼主倒序阅读 0 发表于: 2011-01-18

Kidman: Does it never go away?

Mum: No. I don’t think it does. Not for me. It hasn’t. And that’s going on eleven years. It changes though…

Kidman: How?

Mum: I don’t know. The weight of it, I guess. At some point it becomes bearable. It turns into something you can crawl out from

under, and carry around like a brick in your pocket. And you even forget it for a while. But then you reach it in for whatever reason

and there it is. Oh…right there, which can be awful. But all the time. Sometimes it’s kinda. Not that you like it exactly, but it’s what

you have instead of your son. So you carry it around. And it doesn’t go away, which is…

Kidman: Which is what?

Mum: Fine, actually.

蓓卡問同樣喪子的母親娜娜，這種喪子之痛會消失嗎？
娜娜回答，「不會，我覺得不會。至少對我來說沒有。可是它會變。」
「怎麼變？」蓓卡追問。
「我不知道。」
「它的重量吧，我想。」
「某方面來說，那種感覺變得可以忍受了，他就像你口袋裡的一塊磚頭。
有時候你會忘記他的存在，但是不知何時
你手摸進口袋，就會發現原來他還在；
就這樣，你總是帶著他走，
你不是那麼喜歡他，可是又不願意放手。
就這樣，帶著他走來走去。
其實，還滿……好的。」

PS：兔子洞 --- 《Rabbit Hole》里我很喜欢的一段对话。